SCOTS DIALECT Scots, no matter what the variation, is a local dialect. It is regional speech that has resisted alteration under the influence of television, education and intercomunity exchanges of the kind that modern traffic now introduces. Where mass communications, education, and travel have caused change, the pronunciation of Scotch individuals or communities tends to take on the leveling characteristics of a generalized Scottish-English speech or, for a more limited few, of Standard English. Such speech is little suited to the needs of a stage dialect. Fortunately, in rural areas and small towns, in the Highlands as well as in such cohesive industrial cities as Glasgow, the Scottish dialect, though varied, is still as distinctive as any in the British Isles. Variation, in Scots, is of two kinds. One kind is a matter of degree, the other of difference in pronunciation. In respect to the first, while dialects everywhere range from slight to strong, few can match the swing of Scots from a more-English-than-Scottish accent to a fullness of dialect that not only keeps the form of many words as they were a century ago, but delivers them in a distinctive utterance that challenges the best capabilities of the dialectician. Indeed, the prevalence of older speech forms indicates that in this chapter sounds should be spelled out as well as indicated phonetically. In most Scottish literature, of the last century or of this, narrative passages are written in straight literary style, but dialogue generally is written in dialect. Since older authors are better known and their works more available, the best practice materials for a dialectician are the stories, poems, and songs of famous former writers. As regards differences in pronunciation, an arbitrary division indicates that three major dialects are spoken in Scotland today. One is represented by the speech of the capital, Edinburgh. A second is heard in the Highlands, with an additional strength in the islands beyond. The third comes from the industrial and shipbuilding complex of Glasgow. In all areas, however, certain usages are the same: the front-trilled [r], for example, is heard in varying degrees of strength; the glottal stop is also uniformly used but varies as to stress. In contrast, in each division there are distinctions: the extensive use of the "broad a" [a] in the Highlands; the French-like "u" (sometimes [ju]) of Glasgow speech. As in Ireland, a second language is spoken in Scotland. "Hae ye got [g backward c ?] the Gaelic?" is a phrase often heard when local stories or songs are being discussed. Today fewer and fewer person do "have" the older speech. The Celtic strain is responsible for this second language, which has the same roots as the Irish and Welsh varieties, although it is unlike either of the other two. Nor is the use of Gaelic speech or writing as prevalent in Scotland as Eire. Not that a strong sense of nationalism does not exist in Scotland. It does, but not to the extent of building a noncommunicative fence around the people of the land just to establish a feeling of national individuality. Of the three divisions of the Scottish dialect, the more universally used and the best understood is the speech of Edinburgh - accordingly that form is emphasized here. In all Scots, however, one characteristic immediately calls attention to itself. It is the presence of the antique word in sound and form. YE, AYE, WEE, and such contractions as CANNA (cannot) recall the speech and writing of yesterday, and induce a sense of continuity not present in most modern dialects. Perhaps it is not only the force of custom that keeps the evidence of last century still in the dialect, but the hold of story and song as well - Scott and Stevenson, Burns and Barrie unite fidelity to source material with distinctiveness of style in ways a national consensus is proud to claim. Consequently, older forms are still present and used in everyday speech, spoken easily and without self-consciousness. Experience indicates that certain sounds in Scots are quite difficult of lingual manipulation. These sounds require much practice before they are properly "seated" in the mouth. Otherwise a put-on quality intrudes into the speech. The Scots burr, the extensive "broad a" of the Highlands, and the [u] of Glasgow speech are principal instances. All require exact placement of tongue, lips and jaw before mastery is attained. A good Scots demands time and practice, and to retain fluency periodic reviews are necessary. KEY SOUNDS OF SCOTS A unique feature of Scots is the variation of spelling and pronunciation in many basic words. It is necessary to match yesterday's words to those of today, showing how each can stand in the other's stead, for there is still an unregulated mixture of the two. Many of yesterday's words have an antique look and sound, nor are they always written and spoken alike. Consequently differences are to be expected, not only in the writings of yesterday, but in the written and spoken words of today as well. To a reader of Scottish literature many of the words are already familiar: DEE for DIE, MON for MAN, and DOON for DOWN. An extensive list forms the first part of our Key-Sound Word Drill. In that drill are words that have no sound-alike quality to identify them with their synonyms: BAIRN for CHILD, KIRK for CHURCH, and BEN for MOUNTAIN. These should be known, even though it is more in the province of the writer than the dialectician to instigate their use in sentence context. Each of the three major dialect divisions has its distinguishing characteristics. The broad form of what we have termed Edinburgh speech employs the least number of older words and is the closest in pronunciation to the sounds and idioms of Standard English or American (modern slang phrases, noticeably those of the young, are no longer the property of any one nation or even of any one community). However, the Edinburgh dialect differs from Standard and middle-class English in that it has many fewer broad [a]'s, [upside down v o] diphthongs, [backward c:] vowels and ARY [rI] contractions. As with all Scots it has the glottal stop [?], but uses it less strongly than the others. The fewer the years of education, the more frequently the G of NG [hanging n] is dropped, a dialectal circumstance that holds fairly true throughout the English-speaking world. On a marked decline is the use of an [backward 3'] pronunciation, FAIRST [f backward 3'st] giving way to FIRST [f3st]. A Highland dialect often is the most difficult to understand and to use. At its strongest it can be unintelligible. But it, too, is subject to a process of linguistic erosion that flattens out distinctions. Its most notable feature is an extensive use of the back vowel [broad a], going far beyond American and well beyond Standard English in its employment of the sound. Only in strong Scots does HAD [haed] become [h broad a d], MAN [maen] become [m broad a n], HAND change to [h broad a nd] and MARY [m backward 3 rI] to [m broad a rI]; in some instances the substitution is carried even farther, to the extent that [ backward c:] is used. [u], as in POOL, is also heard extensively, causing FOOT [fUt] to be pronounced [fut]. Older words and phrases are retained in Highland and island speech more than elsewhere. A native of Glasgow is called a Glaswegian. He lives in a highly industrial environment. As might be expected, much of the speech in this area sounds tight and twangy, not altogether pleasant to hear, and consequently not always desirable to reproduce. One Glaswegian actor characterized the native utterance as largely composed of nasal tones, pitched in a high rather then low register, and delivered between reluctant muscles. Proper though the above characterization might be, it is not wholly true. Some Glaswegian speech is surprisingly soft. Whether or not it is the product of suburbs and outlying areas, as it may be, it is a dialect of sufficient attractiveness to merit study and use. In it the [r] is softer than that heard in other regions and the "broad a" [a] is not used as often and as strongly as it is in Highland speech. Further, the Glaswegian is fluent in contractions. Most of all he sounds his [u], as in POOL, with a difference. Actually he does not use an exact [u], but fits his sound part way between [u] and [U]; in addition, he gives it a Frenchlike placement, so that it is closer to the French sound of [y], as in UNE, than to the [u] the rest of us use. And it is from this last that much of his softness comes. An example of this dialect may be heard on the accompanying tape. Vowel Substitutions 1. [broad a]. Except for the Highlander, the average Scotsman uses the back vowel [braod a], as in FATHER, less than his English cousin. Thus HALF [haef] is not lkely to be [h broad a f]. But the Highlander uses it more, so that we can say that this sound is both under- and overused as far as speech in the British Isles is concerned. But the broad a [a] is not a marked feature of a Scottish dialect. 2. [I] TO [backward 3]. As a continuant of earlier speech, [backward 3] as in EH can substitute for [I] as in IT. Thus BIT [bIt] becomes BET [b backward 3 t], and MINISTER ['mInIst upside down e], MENISTER ['m backward 3 nIst upside down e]. 3. [3] TO [backward 3']. This alteration produces one of the most distinctive sounds in the Scottish dialect. To produce it, the usual sound of [3] as in HER is changed by first enunciating [backward 3], as in EH, then adding a tapped or trilled [r]. The result is that both the [backward 3] and [r] are distinctly heard. Thus PERFECT ['p3fIkt] becomes PAIRPECT ['p backward 3'fIkt]. For our purpose (or ['p backward 3'p upside down e s]) the symbol [backward 3'] indicates this particular combination of sounds, that is, [backward 3] closely followed by a tapped [r]. 4. [U] TO [u]. The upper back vowel [u], as in POOL, also has a distinctive and heavy use in Scots. It has all of its regular assignments - USE, DO, GREW - and additionally is substituted for many [U] vowels - GOOD, BOOK - as well as the [au] diphthong, as in OUT. GOOD then becomes GUDE [gud] and OUT, OOT [ut]. In many Scottish variations the [u] has the exact value Americans give it. But in some Highland speech and in the Glasgow area it receives a different treatment. The sound is given with lips rounded, jaw dropped, and tongue against the back of the lower teeth. The result is very close to the French [y], as heard in UNE [yn]. Thus FOOT [fUt], after being changed in regular Scots to [fut], is altered still further by a Glaswegian or a Highlander to the soft sound of [fyt]. This last refinement, although not essential, adds a pleasing and distinctive sound to a Scottish dialect. 5. LIMITED SUBSTITUTIONS. There are several instances in which Scots employs a vowel substitution on a limited number of words, sometimes as few as two. But because these words are either so common - TAKE - or so distinctive - LOCH - they should be known. a. [e] TO [ae]. Two words hold to an older form. TAKE might be pronounced TAK [taek], and MAKE, MAK [maek]. b. [backward 3] TO [i]. One of the most antique of Scottish sounds occurs when [backward 3], as in HEAD, is pronounced with an [i], making HEAD [h backward 3 d] HEED [hid], and FRIEND [fr backward 3 nd] FREEND [frind]. In a variation, the [i] is also heard when EYE [aI] becomes EEN [in]. The last use of this substitution is limited and is usually best left to the judgement of those who write the dialogue. It is much used by the older writers. c. [x]. This symbol represents the sound of CH as in the Scots word for LAKE, which is LOCH [l backward c x]. The exclamation ACH, or OCH, also carries this Germanlike sound and is still used in ordinary conversation in many parts of the country, especially in the Highlands. The syllable is made by a strong but not too long expulsion of breath on the vowels [broad a] as in FATHER, or [backward c] as in OUGHT, and ended with a very slight tap of the back of the tongue against the uvula. d. [hanging c]. Another Germanlike sound is given with as much aspiration as the above, but with the placement forward in the front vowel position of [I], as in IT. The words RIGHT and BRIGHT, both of which might be pronounced in the regular fashion with only the variance of a Scotch tapped [r], illustrate this distinctly Scottish sound. Spelled phonetically, they appear as RI-K-T [rI hanging c t] and BRI-K-T [brI hanging c t]. Orally, the extra breath, which is necessary for the [hanging c] sound, is stopped by the closure of [k], which in turn is completed before the [t] is pronounced. 6. [upside down e]. Scots often injects an extra vowel in a word, especially after an [r]. It is the schwa vowel, the unstressed form of [upside down v], and is written as [backward e]. The addition of the extra syllable stretches the word sound. In which case WARM [w broad a rm] becomes WARUM [w broad a r upside down e m], and ALARM [upside down e'l broad a rm], ALARUM [upside down e'l broad a r upside down e m]. While the injection of [upside down e] is commonplace, it is not used by all; the better educated employ the shorter regular form. The word FILM, pronounced FILUM [fIl upside down e m], however, is in the vocabulary of all. 7. ELONGATED VOWELS: [i], [e], [o]. It is common practice in all Scots for each of these vowels to be held slightly longer than is usual in ordinary conversation. The [e], as in EIGHT, is often extended into the diphthong [eI] (a commonplace occurrence in all forms of English speech). The extension is heard in several instances, as when MINISTER is neither ['mInIst upside down e] nor ['m backward 3 nIst upside down e] but MAINESTER ['meInIst upside down e], or when STONE is STAIN [steIn]. Diphthongal Changes 1. [aU] TO [u]. In modern Scots, a slight elongation of the diphthong [aU], as in OUT, differentiates it from a like American sound. But in those instances in which an older pronunciation is used, OUT [aUt] changes to OOT [ut]. If a Glaswegian is speaking, the OOT [ut] can become [yt]. Consonant Substitutions 1. [r]. In yet another manifestation of its versatility, [r] receives a new treatment in Scots: the front tongue tap or trill. This is a national characteristic. Its action produces the Scotch burr. Fully flexible and with practiced ease the tongue taps once or trills two or three times when an [r] is formed. The degree of trill is determined by the nature of the adjacent vowel, or the emphasis each speaker assigns to the sound. Consequently a slight or a strong burr will be heard, but each as fluent as full flexibility allows. More than ordinary time in practice is recommended. 2. [?]. Scots employs the glottal stop, written [?]. Daniel Jones, in his ENGLISH PRONOUNCING DICTIONARY, describes a glottal stop as "the plosive consonant formed by bringing the vocal chords together so that when they are separated the air from the lungs escapes suddenly causing audible plosion." T and TT are the letters most used for this sound. It is heard in medial and terminal syllables, as for instance, BETTER, pronounced ['b backward 3 ? upside down e], or GOT [g backward c ?]. The Cockney also employs a glottal stop. 3. DROPPING A FINAL CONSONANT. In older Scots it is quite usual to elimate a final consonant on many common words, and on some contractions. In which case SMALL becomes SMA', and CANNOT is shortened to CANNA. Many of the words in which this action occurs are listed in the Key-Sound Word Drill. 4. [hanging n]. In rural areas and in the speech of a lower middle-class or uneducated person, the G of NG [hanging n] is dropped, giving [n]. KEY-SOUND WORD DRILL Word Variations Space is left below each line for scoring phonetic or other symbols. A pause after each word permits immediate repetition. (Voice: Jerry Blunt) yes / aye oh yes / och aye pretty / bonny both / baith brave / braw bridge / brig brook / burn child / bairn clothes / claithes church / kirk cold / cauld come / coom dagger / dirk dirty / clairty either OR either OR aither from / frae fret / fash father / faither mother / mither OR maither good / gud OR gude give / gae OR gee go / gang hands / hons home / hame hill / brae have / hae hat / bonnet Highland / Hieland lack / loch lord / laird many / mony man / mon money / siller more / mair most / maist mountain / ben big OR much / muckle no / nae not / no' old / ault one / aine OR yin over / ower plaid OR tartan poor / puir run / rin small / sma' OR wee sore / sair sour / dour OR dure so / sae stone / stain talk / crack to / tae told / tauld OR telt up / oop very / verra well / weel what / whit where / whoore you / ye OR ya Vowel Substitutions 1. [broad a]. In those instances in which it is used, that is Highland speech.) Aberdeen, any, bashful, hand, man, Mary - and in extreme cases, [backward c], any, hand, man. 2. [I] TO [backward 3]. Bitter, is, minute, fifty, misfortune, six. 3. [3] TO [backward 3']. First, earn, thirsty, search, perfect, observe. 4. [U] TO [u]. Book, good, brook, foot, put. 5. LIMITED SUBSTITUTIONS: a. [e] TO [ae]. Make, take. b. [backward 3] TO [i]. Friend, head, well. c. [aI] TO [i]. Die, eye. d. [x]. Ach, och, loch. e. [hanging c]. Bright, light, night, right. 6. [upside down e]. Farm, film, worm, alarm. 7. ELONGATED VOWELS: [i], [e], [o]. Each, cheat, free, great, plaid, oak, hold. Diphthongal Changes 1. [aU] TO [u]. About, down, doubt, house, out. Consonant Substitutions 1. [r]. Rose, arrive, fear. 2. [?]. Better, glottal, water, pity, likely, got, great, not. 3. DROPPING FINAL CONSONANT. And, all, away, grand, call, small, awful, with, cannot, do not, could not. 4. [n]. Coming, doubting, searching. KEY SOUNDS IN SENTENCE CONTEXT Vowel Substitutions 1. [broad a]. The master was took bad after Aberdeen. 2. [I] TO [backward 3]. It's a pity the minister had that misfortune. 3. [3] TO [backward 3']. First let us search for her purse. 4. [U] TO [u]. They heard the good book read by the brook. 5. [e] TO [ae]; [backward 3] TO [i]; [aI] TO [i], [x], [hanging c]. You will not make a good friend if you hit him over the head or in the eye. / Och, aye, the loch was very bright last night. 6. [upside down e]. The worm lives in the ground on the farm. Diphthongal Changes 1. [aU] TO [u]. The poor wee mouse ran a' around the door. Consonant Substitutions 1. [r]. Rob Roy was not a man to rise from a hearth in fear. 2. [?]. It's a great pity the loch has not got enough water. 3. DROPPING FINAL CONSONANTS. You cannot call all the small bairns away. 4. [n]. Georgie was taking the searching party and they were running along the burn. Sentences Written in Dialect Form I'll tak ye oop the brae, Jamie, an' we'll hae a luk at the auld kirk. It's a gran' sight, ye can be sure o' that. Weel, noo, I hae ma doots aboot the Labor Party, but we'll see hoo it turns oot. My, Willie, but yer dirty. Gee us yer hons; they'll hae to be washed. Hoo are ye, Maister McDougal? ("Down" given two ways) Do ye ken, they're pullin' down the ould brig doon at the burn? Och, aye, it's the pipers of the Clan MacClure that are comin' frae the sma' toon. Angus, will ye no tak a luk at the wee bairn wi' her bonny kilt? The red stag roams the Hieland moors. Haggis was served, ho' and tasty, in celebration of the birthday of Bobbie Burns. Maggie, if ye just poot a new wee flower on yer auld bonnet, an' screw ets shape aboot a bet, it'll do weel enough. A' the kilts of yon proud lads and lassies show the huntin' plaid of the royal Stuart. READING FOR FLUENCY To a Mouse, on Turning Her Up in Her Nest with the Plough, Robert Burns (Voice: David Crampsey) Wee, sleekit, cow'rin, tim'rous beastie, O what a panic's in thy breastie! Thou need na start awa sae hasty, Wi' bickering brattle! I wad be laith to rin an' chase thee Wi' murd'ring pattle! I'm truly sorry man's dominion Has broken Nature's social union, An' justifies that ill opinion Which makes thee startle At me, thy poor earth-born companion, An' fellow-mortal! I doubt na, whiles, but thou may thieve; What then, poor beastie, thou maun live! A daimen-icker in a thrave 'A a sma' request: I'll get a blessin' wi' the lave, And never miss 't! Thy wee bit housie, too, in ruin! Its silly wa's the win's are strewin'! An' naething, now, to big a new ane, O' foggage green! An' bleak December's winds ensuin', Baith snell an' keen! Thou saw the fields laid bare and waste, An' weary winter comin' fast, An' cozie here, beneath the blast, Thou thought to dwell, Till crash! the cruel coulter past Out-thro' thy cell. That wee bit heap o' leaves an' stibble Has cost thee mony a weary nibble! Now thou's turn'd out, for a' thy trouble, But house or hald, To thole the winter's sleety dribble, An' cranreuch cauld! But, Mousie, thou art no thy lane, In proving foresight may be vain: The best laid schemes o' mice an' men Gang aft a-gley, An' lea'e us nought but grief an' pain For promised joy. Still thou art blest compar'd wi' me! The present only toucheth thee: But oh! I backward cast my e'e On prospects drear! An' forward tho' I canna see, I guess an' fear! Macbeth, Shakespeare; Act I, Scene 5 (Voice: Shona McCann; Glasgow) The following passage is read in the accents of modern-day Glasgow speech. In addition to the key sounds, note the pitch patterns, especially those in which the pitch is left suspended, rather than uttered in the descending notes generally used for terminal thoughts. This unique pitch pattern is heard in conversation as well as in the reading of prepared material. LADY MACBETH. "They met me in the day of success; and I have learned by the perfectest report, they have more in them than mortal knowledge. When I burned in desire to question them further, they made themselves air, into which they vanished. Whiles I stood rapt in the wonder of it, came missives from the king, who all-hailed me, 'Thane of Cawdor', by which title, before, these wierd sisters saluted me, and referred me to the coming on of time with 'Hail, king that shalt be!' This have I thought good to deliver thee, my dearest partner of greatness, that thou mightst not lose the dues of rejoicing by being ignorant of what greatness is promised thee. Lay it to thy heart, and farewell." Glamis thou art, and Cawdor, and shalt be What thou art promised. Yet do I fear thy nature; It is too full o' the milk of human kindness To catch the nearest way. Thou wouldst be great, Art not without ambition, but without The illness should attend it. What thou wouldst highly That wouldst thou holily; wouldst not play false, And yet wouldst wrongly win. Thou'dst have, great Glamis, that which cries, "Thus thou must do, if thou have it, And that which rather thou dost fear to do Than wishest should be undone." Hie thee hither, That I may pour my spirits in thine ear, And chastise with the valor of my tongue All that impedes thee from the golden round, Which Fate and metaphysical aid doth seem To have the crown'd withal. Auld Lang Syne, Robert Burns The next passage is read in a noninterpretive manner and is deliberate in tempo that you might better study the sounds of Glaswegian speech. (Voice: Shona McCann. Glasgow) VERSES We twa hae run about the braes, And pu'd the gowans fine; But we've wander'd mony a weary foot Sin' auld lang syne. We twa hae paidled i' the burn, From morning sun till dine; But seas between us braid hae roar'd Sin' auld lang syne. And there's a hand, my trusty fiere,* And gie's a hand o' thine; And we'll tak a right guid-willie waught For auld lang syne. And surely ye'll be your pint-stowp, And surely I'll be mine; And we'll tak a cup o' kindness yet For auld lang syne. * Pronounced [fIr] or [f backward 3']; it is easy to hear this word as frere. CHORUS Should auld acquaintance be forgot, And never brought to min'? Should auld acquaintance be forgot, And auld lang syne? For auld lang syne, my dear. For auld lang syne, We'll tak a cup o' kindness yet, For auld lang syne. SIGHT READING AND FLUENCY PRACTICE To a Louse, on Seeing One on a Lady's Bonnet at Church, Robert Burns (Portion) Ha! wh'are ye gaun, ye crowlin' ferlie! Your impudence protects you sairly: I cannot say but ye strunt rarely, Owre gauze and lace; Tho' faith! I fear ye dine but sparely On sic a place. Ye ugly, creepin', blastit wonner, Detested, shunn'd by saunt an' sinner! How dare ye set your fit upon her, Sae fine a lady? Gae somewhere else, and seek your dinner On some poor body. Swith, in some beggar's haffet squattle; There ye may creep, and sprawl, and sprattel Wi' ither kindred jumping cattle, In shoals and nations; Where horn nor bane ne'er dare unsettle Your thick plantations. O wad some Pow'r the giftie gie us To see oursels as others see us! It wad frae mony a blunder free us, And foolish notion: What airs in dress an' gait wad lea'e us, And ev'n devotion! ON TOUR IN EDINBURGH "Well, here we are now," said the guide, and his voice was thick with a native accent, for he had learned that the more roll he put on an "r" the better the tourist took to his remarks, and the more likelihood of a good tip at the end of the tour. "From here ye can see the whole city - Scotland's capital and her pride, Edinburgh. Yon's Arthur's Seat. You will be told more of that later. Right now, from where we're standing, you are looking at one of the grand thoroughfares of the world. That's Princes Street down below, with the best of modern shops on the one side, and on the other the walks and gardens that make the street famous, all topped with the stirring sight of the Castle itself towering over all. "Ladies, if it's spending siller you're after, you will do no better than take a good look in all the shops along the street. There is merchandise of all sorts, from wee gifts ye can smuggle home for the bairns you left behind, swimming in all your pools, to onything you've got the money to buy in rich jewels and the like. And there's spirits for those gentlemen that have the good sense to ken there is no better liquor bottled anywhere in the wide world." He turned to two middle-aged men standing to his right, "And don't think you know the taste of it from what you've had at home - dinna ye ken, we're no crazy - what's good we drink oursel'; ye get what's left over. "If it's claithes you want, take a look at what a master weaver can do with a bit of the finest wool in the world. All home grown. None of that stringy stuff they get off the jock sheep that roam the moors in that country situated somewhat to the south of us, and which the Sassenach will try to sell you at reduced prices. Ours tops them all, that's sure enough. And for those of you fortunate enough to have Scotch blood in your veins, you maun just discover the tartan of your clan. They've book for that, ye know. You can have a kilt made up in either the dress or the hunting plaid, and then wear it when you go to a fancy dress ball, for I'm told it's not proper to wear a kilt on the street in your country, no doubt a custom designed to protect the feelings of those poor folk who canna claim a connection with the land you are now in. "Now just look at the other side of the street. Never mind the sight of the railroad tracks laid there - do you see how cunning they've covered them up, so that the beauty of the place is not disturbed at all by the presence of a thriving traffic? "Now just look there at the near end - do you see that monument with the spires piercing the sky? That's the memorial to Sir Walter Scott, the man that taught the English how to write a story. The tower is Gothic they say, and I have no doubt it's true, for you can't keep people from coming to see what our best have done so they can go home and enjoy the same themselves. "Beyond is the Mound. That's the place where free speech was born, where every man can make his crack about how the world should be run. But he's got to be quick with his thoughts and his tongue, for there's mony who will take him on and try his mettle, and the exchange is right sharp. They say that Lon'on has something like, tucked away in a corner of some public park or other. I'll take you down later and you can hear for yourself how they make their crack. "Just beside is the National Gallery, where priceless works of art are shown. The Scottish masters are in there, and good works by others, too, if you've time to bide in such a quiet place. "And now do you see that patch of bright just beyond? You should ken what that is right enough, for it's been put in photos and films all over the world. You're looking at the famous flower clock of Princes Street. The numbers and the hands are all in growing flowers. And below the ground are all the clock's works, so cunning the piece keeps perfect time. We maun take a closer look when we get back down below, so save some of your film. It's too bonny a sight to let pass by. "And off to your left and rising in all its majesty is Edinburgh Castle itself. Just see the strength of it, and beauty, too, but that will come better when we're below looking up. For now just trace the rise by following the course of High Street. See yon palace at the near end? That's Holyrood, rich with the history of this land. There lived Mary Stuart, the most beautiful lass that ever came to be queen. There was dark work done there, too, murders and all the like. Rizzio, Mary's musician, was struck down with a dirk. Lord Huntley it was did it, and Lord Darnley, the Queen's husband, behind it, so they say. "Aye, there was more than one tragedy there, and many of a different kind. 'Twas there our Bonnie Prince Charlie, after defeating the English for good and all, could not resist the lure of the pretty lassies of Edinburgh and spent his time dancing in the palace when he should have followed the foe and run them off the land. Too bonnie he was, for himself and for Scotland. "Holyrood's the Queen's now, her that is Elizabeth the First of Scotland," He paused, and then with a small smile, "We're not too sure about that other one, she that pretended to the throne of England and grabbed it off our Mary. "But be that as it may, if you will just look to the right of the palace you can see the chapel ruins. The roof and most of the walls are long gone, leaving the arches and the outlines of a window or two. There's nothing like a good ruin for photos. Lets your folk know you've been to one country that's got history behind it. You are short on ruins, I'm told. Too new. It's a pity. Ruins are good for business. "Well, enough of Holyrood. Just trace your eye up the street. We'll be going there shortly and then you will know where you are. John Knox's house is along there - he was a bit of a dour one, was John - and then beyond is St. Giles. That's no kirk, it's a cathedral. It's the home of the Stone of Scone, that bit of rock that's to be sat on or ever the crown will fit. "And after that, the Esplanade and then the Castle itself. And that's where we're going now. I've cracked enough in this place to give you what you paid for. Tighten your camera straps, and back on the bus." excerpted from Chapter IX: pages 91 through 99, 101 through 104 Stage Dialects by Jerry Blunt Harper & Row, Publishers